Beer for Girlie Men
By now you’ve seen the Heineken walk-in fridge commercial.
The spot opens with a woman leading three girlfriends on a tour of her new house. They wind up at a humongous walk-in closet. The girls scream their delight for a few seconds then stop, puzzled, as louder but equally girlish screaming emanates from elsewhere in the house. An echo, perhaps?
No such luck. It’s the women’s husbands! The boys are standing in a giant walk-in beer fridge, screaming in ecstasy and about to pee their pants as they channel their wives, pressing their palms against their chests and/or faces – an appropriate, if unintended, reference to Munch’s Scream painting. One exuberant screamer flaps his arms at the elbows, clapping in short strokes like that toy bear with cymbals on his paws. It’s not just idiotic, it’s repulsive.
The commercial insults every adult on the planet but that wouldn’t be a problem if it was funny. Put Dick Butkus in the spot and it might be funny. This one’s not funny because the couples are status conscious trendoids straight from central casting; the men look like the kind of guys who scream their delight and the women look like The Real Housewives of Rotterdam.
The tagline on the Dutch version is “Serving the planet” although why it’s in English I can’t imagine. Maybe they thought the audience needed another “What the f—?” moment. The US tag is “Give yourself a good name.” I’m guessing the copywriter was kidding.
If this is global marketing, to hell with it.
The Dutch spot is here: Click Here
Bavaria, a German brewery, has a nifty spin on the Heineken screamer spot. Roughly the same set up, except in German. A Russell Crowe lookalike sits alone on a sofa as the touring ladies walk behind him. A few seconds later he hears the menfolk screaming. He walks toward the ruckus, sees what’s going on and closes the doors of the giant beer fridge with the screamers inside.
Then he walks to a normal fridge, takes out a bottle of Bavaria and returns to the living room to join the ladies, the real ladies, back on the sofa.
The Bavaria spot is here:
In a November 4 Guts, we wondered how so many great beer brands managed to get themselves killed. Heineken’s off to a great start.